That Vmax is going to get me into trouble one day

I was riding north on a certain road in the state of ILL on my Vmax when some meatball on Harley Davidson blows by me in my lane. We meet up at the next light, he looks over at me and with cigar hanging out of his mouth and says “Japanese piece of shit.”  I thought to myself “Okay MOFO, game on, bitch.”

I turned my head toward him to get a better look at my new best buddy. I could see without doubt he was a product of damaged DNA. Probably a neutrino escaping from the sun collided with the DNA sequence used to make brain cells. Leaving him a few billon short. Looked in my mirrors to see his two chimp friends behind us on their HD’s. This is going to be fun I thought.

He had just about every HD promotional product on his body. He had the boots, shirt, vest, gloves and his scarf helmet. Included in his ensemble was a couple HD tattoos on his arm. I don’t know about you but if I wore all that stuff I would want to be paid for it. I know people buy this stuff to feel a sense of belonging. To me buying all this crap just helps the Chinese economy.

The light changes to green and I crack the throttle wide open. Two things are now in my sight, the tachometer needle flying across tachometer and the stupid look disappearing from his face in my mirror. After that it was just shift light flashes and gear changes. I slowed down so we could meet at the next light.

When he got to light, I looked over at him and told him “nice motorcycle.”  No response for him, kind of hurt my feelings. I tried to communicate with him again “nice paint job” I told him. He didn’t even look at me. His cigar was now missing from his mouth.He just didn’t look the same without it either. I hope he didn’t swallow it. Gave him one more glance to see if the communication path was open. No, not much to say. He was watching the traffic light like his life depended on it.

The light turned green, off he went laying rubber on the pavement. I started counting, one thousand, two thousand and three thousand. I think his HD buddies were confused with my delay. I turned the throttle and held on.  I think my Vmax realized it was behind and got angry. Like some thoroughbred race horses do when they are behind. I didn’t look at the tachometer this time just the shift light. I passed him like he was standing still.

The rush of all of that speed made me forgo the thought of damage to myself or anyone else. I’m pretty sure I would have continued to increase my velocity if it wasn’t for the speedometer. 137 mph, “oh shit, OH SHIT.” 137 mph in 45 mph speed zone! My non-damaged, but slow, brain quickly did the math. 137 divided 45 equals good-bye drivers license for a long long time. Which means the wife would be driving me around for the next 10 years. I know she would be looking forward to that.

Thank you very much for reading my blog post. Please checkout my You Tube channel coolcycledude and follow me on twitter @coolcycledude. Enjoy your life and be safe.

10 thoughts on “That Vmax is going to get me into trouble one day”

  1. Yeah, those urges are sometime hard to repress, I know that.

    But still, stay cool.
    Cooler than that.

    Even on a straight highway, 137 is madness…

  2. I really don’t get the hardcore HD mentality. Who the heck cares what people choose to ride?!? Besides, HD’s crap is all Made In China… so much for the American Legend and your Japanese POS shouldn’t be that offensive to the average HD rider. Oh, well. I agree, if I’m that covered in HD merch, it can only mean one thing: the MoCo done sponsored me. LOL

    As a sport bike rider, my answer is the standard “I would buy American, if they made a bike I would want to ride.” The less communicative of the crowd get the same treatment from me as Mr. Cigar did from you in Round 2. Yes, some of these specimens actually think they can take an S1000RR off the line. Maybe it’s because I’m a chick and they don’t think I could burn one standing still. 😉 I do belong in the bitch seat, after all.

    Even though Eric Buell is getting damn close to my drooling zone… with that 1125 of his.

    As a former HD rider (my first bike was a Sporty 1200 Low) these people make me ashamed to admit to ever have owned a Harley.

    1. Me neither, everyone wants to belong to something, I guess. How’s that motorcycle of yours doing? Causing trouble on twitter? Thanks for read my blog.

  3. Yeah, been there too on my Buell Ulysses! Really do not understand where the superior attitude comes from, for everyone else riding a motorcycle is a reason for a nod/smile/chat at a set of lights.

    Keep the rubber side down 😉

  4. I wish these holier than thou HD posers would take all the jap parts off their precious AMERICAN Harley Davidsons and see how far they’d get.

    That’s my standard response to these a-holes.

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